Parshat Nitzavim-Vayeilech - Jealousy Is Worse Than Death
by Rabbi Lobel

(Deuteronomy; Chapter 31, Verse 14) "G-d spoke to Moses, "Behold your days are drawing near to die; summon Joshua, and both of you shall stand in the Tent of the Meeting, and I shall command him."

Moses himself was to pass the reins of leadership to Joshua. Joshua, acting as king, would speak with G-d. Rashi, on the verse, understood that G-d would encourage Joshua upon his daunting task.

The Medrash Rabba (30:9) relates the incident as follows: Moses walked into the tent on Joshua's left. G-d's glory appeared between the two of them and only spoke to Joshua. Moses asked Joshua to tell him G-d's words. Joshua replied, "When G-d's glory revealed itself to you (Moses), I (Joshua) did not know what it said." The Maharzu, a commentary on the Medrash, explains that Moses had previously instructed Joshua that one should not ask someone to repeat revelations of G-d. At this point, Moses screamed, "One hundred deaths but not one feeling of jealousy."

Moses understood that the pain of feeling jealous is so wrong that dying one hundred times is worth the exchange.

With all the love that Moses had for Joshua and his willingness to pass the crown to him, surely the feeling of jealousy could not have been so terrible. Yet, the personal hurt one incurs from feeling jealous is so great that Moses would have preferred death over being jealous.